


DO YOU WANT THE FUCKING CHEESECAKE THAT'S ALL I WANT TO KNOW

by heysteph



Category: Fall Out Boy
Genre: Gen, for limp dick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-28
Updated: 2018-05-28
Packaged: 2019-05-15 03:45:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14783000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heysteph/pseuds/heysteph
Summary: Patrick paced around his kitchen angrily, occasionally taking a glance down at his phone. Joe was over and he was about to dump his entire problem onto him.





	DO YOU WANT THE FUCKING CHEESECAKE THAT'S ALL I WANT TO KNOW

**Author's Note:**

> this is dedicated to our favorite patrick falloutbird for inspiring this. thanks pat.

Patrick paced around his kitchen angrily, occasionally taking a glance down at his phone. Joe was over and he was about to dump his entire problem onto him.

“This is what he said,” he began saying, rage filling his voice. He looked to the message.

“Patrick, exclamation exclamation exclamation. SEESAW dot dot dot ALWAYS SEESAW! But im home for the night.” He took a small pause. “What the FUCK does that mean? DO YOU WANT THE FUCKING CAKE OR DO YOU NOT WANT THE FUCKING CAKE? Just say ‘I would like the cake, I can meet you at 5’O Clock Patrick’ OR ‘Patrick, Im not at home today, can I get it tomorrow will you hold it for me?’ ‘YES PETE i’ll hold the cake for you until tomorrow.’.

He paused again, but only for a second. “But this is what I said to him: ‘would you like me to drop it off to you Pete?’ his response: ‘I’M IN THE COUNTRY PATRICK.’ WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN? ‘I’M IN THE COUNTRY?’ MY CAR DRIVES TO THE COUNTRY, AND TO THE CITY. IT GOES ALL THE WAY TO FRICKIN DALLAS PETER. DO YOU WANT THE FUCKING CHEESECAKE THAT'S ALL I WANT TO KNOW.”

“So he says, ‘But, I could go for it DOT DOT DOT yum!’ DO YOU WANT THE CHEESECAKE? I-I-I’m not pressuring you. YOU responded to MY post. Just tell me Pete. Do you WANT THE CHEESECAKE? Do I-” He gestured to the cake he was currently decorating- “I am in the middle of making this cake. Do I look like i’ve got time-” He led Joe to his fridge- “Come look at my ‘fridgerator. Come look. Do I look like i’ve got time to mess with your- look I’ve got cheesecake i’ve got a strawberry cake i’ve got a turtle cheesecake here. Look-” He took Pete’s cheesecake out of the fridge- 

“I’ve got your personal cheesecake right here PETER. PETE IT’S RIGHT HERE. COME GET YOUR FUCKING CHEESECAKE. That’s all.”


End file.
